Belated Merry Christmas

Hey all

Merry late Christmas! Sorry this wasn't actually on Christmas day however even though I managed to fill my car boot to the brim with things to take to my parents I actually managed to forget my lovely writing device.

I have been there since Xmas Eve and it was lovely to spend the time with them relaxing, eating and playing games. I am now back home now and just like every year it feels like all of it never really happened. Like it was some kind of dream or something. I do however have some lovely gifts to play with. Lots of new make-up, and for all you ladies out there you will know what it is like to get nice new expensive make-up. I also got another one of my favourite things, underwear! Who can ever have too much underwear. Certainly not me.

I am now not back to work until the 2nd of Jan so still have loads of time off to chill and enjoy myself. Starting with tomorrow. I am off to a spa and cannot wait. It is my last bit of luxury for a while as I really need to stop spending money and start saving for my up and coming little trip!

The next on the list after the Spa is New Years eve. I cannot wait for that one as I feel it is going to go out with a bang!

Hope you all had a great Christmas and are getting some well earned relaxing time in. I know I am!

-x-

Catch up

Sorry for being off the radar lately. I have been working away from home again and this week they put us in a hotel with no wifi in the rooms. I didn't much fancy sitting in the hotel reception writing down my secrets and confessions.

So confessions brings me on to the latest event in my life. Last weekend I slept with hotel boy. I don't really know why or quite how but it happened. I am not going to say I regret it as  honestly I don't however I do think I need to start sleeping with new people and hopefully the next time it will be with someone I am proud to tell you guys about.

Anyway more exciting things, my old roommate is coming home tomorrow and I am really excited. We have already made plans with our other old roommate for New Year which I am really looking forward to. It does however mean I have to get up early and get the house ready for her return.

Right I have to end this now as I have loads of Christmas pressies to wrap. Yay Christmas!
But I will give you a proper catch up with what is happening with everyone soon!

-x-

Thank you Mr Wise

So after my mini guilty meltdown last week Mr Wise came to my rescue.

He knew all the right things to say to make me feel better. I still feel bad however no where near as much as I did. At the end of the day - I am the single one. I am not the one who has to go home to my "loved" one and lie about where I spent the previous night.

The other thing he helped me with is get me my visa to Canada today. It was a race against time as they only release a small number of places and he sat there and waited for it to open and register me whilst I had to work. Whilst it isn't 100% confirmed yet, it is pretty much as good as done.

So people this means 2014 I shall be in Australia followed by 2015 in Canada, my life is hard isn't it.

To end this post I just want to say, Thank you Mr Wise. You have been a great friend and I will miss you when we go our seperate ways however watch out in 2015 as one day there will be a knock at your door and guess who will be stood on the front step :o)

-x-

We all make mistakes

And I have made an epic one!

To say I am upset would be an understatement right now. I am not sure how to say this and I know a lot of people are going to judge me for this and honestly I wouldn't blame them.

Friday night I slept with Mr FWB and I feel horrible about it. Not only have I let myself down I am also so in the wrong as he has a girlfriend which I am sure you all remember reading about.

What sort of person does that?! I will tell you, a mean horrible one.

I don't really know how it happened. It just sort of did and whilst it is no excuse I was very very drunk. He just wouldn't leave me alone. Telling me he loved me and that before he had chance to tell me he wanted to be with me I told him I was leaving to go to Australia bla bla.

Now I don't believe a word that comes out of his mouth but still he shouldn't have said those things.

The worst part is everyone we were with from work saw him kiss me and I know they all think I am so bad. Who can blame them it is true!

Anyway I cannot carry on writing this as I don't want to think about it anymore. I just really hope his girlfriend does not find out as she does not deserve this at all!

Sorry guys

-x-

Who would have thought?

So recently I have been looking at one of my friends and thinking of them in a different way.
It surprises me really as I genuinely would have never thought of them in that way. Honestly though I just think I am missing the attention of men and am craving something. That however is no reason to head to a place where I shouldn't really go.

So instead today I went shopping and bought myself some nice underwear. That should keep my mind distracted for a while - shouldn't it?!

Work has been crazy and wont let up for a while. Oh well not long till I head off on my adventure. Excited much!!

Have good weekends guys - I have to work :o(

-x-

(I have just realised that this never posted last weekend so I have posted it now)

Just not good enough

So I have just had a Skype session with Melissa and I hope she doesn't mind me telling you this but she was a little upset.

A guy she has liked for the longest time had just arrived at the pub she was at with his new girlfriend and this left her feeling very a little down in the dumps to say the least.

She wanted to know why she wasn't good enough and why it was never her he had chosen. I also should mention that they have been more than just friends in the past.

I think we have all felt this way at some point in our lives (we all know who I am talking about in my life). Anyway we have all felt this way and it is not a nice feeling at all but it is also not a true feeling either. We are good enough, we are just not right for that particular person. Obviously I tried to tell Melissa this but no one really wants to hear it.

They want to be told what is wrong with them and how they can fix it. Being told that it is basically the way of life does not fix things. However I genuinely believe you can only feel truly better about yourself when you finally find someone who really deserves you.

So this is a message to Melissa. You are good enough and one day just like me, you will find your Mr perfect! If all else fails we have each other!

-x-

Is it unfair?

So I have just been driving back from seeing Olivia for the last time in a long while and on the journey home I had a lot of time to be left with my own thoughts (never good).

I was reflecting on my life and mostly my love life and all I kept thinking was how all of my ex's were now happy and with someone else whilst I was alone. Now the alone part does not bother me, what really bothers me is why do they get to be happy when each and every single one of them were not exactly lovely to me and all left me with scars I will never get rid of.

Is that fair? Why do they get to have what they want and where is the karma?

The other side I guess is I do not know what goes on behind closed doors and they could in fact be miserable. We can but hope :o)

Also I believe my Mr perfect is out there somewhere and the world has a plan for me to meet him one day and stick two fingers up to those arses that did me wrong!

Happy Saturday night guys. Hope whilst mine is filled with thoughts yours are filled with alcohol and dancing!

-x-

Nervous

So yesterday I went through what can only be classed as pre travelling stage fright!

It was sort of one of those moments when you suddenly go "Oh Lord what am I doing". I just kept thinking what if it isn't like the last time I went travelling and I don't end up meeting anyone, or I can't find work and have to come home.

However after speaking to Melissa she reasured me that what I was doing was the right thing and that I was going to have a great time. I guess I just hope I meet people like her and all the other people I met whilst travelling.

Anyway it is the weekend. I am going to forget all about the stress of work and just relax whilst trying to learn how to type on the smallest keyboard ever (I have my new tablet ready for travelling and I am trying it out right now)

Hope everyone has a great weekend and just remember if ever in doubt - try it anyway!

-x-

Stuart

So I told you I met a guy when I was the plane on the way to Spain well his name as the title explains was Stuart.

Now Stuart was an interesting character and pretty much from the moment we sat down he started speaking to me. Now I personally am not really one for idle chit chat however I could tell that Stuart really just wanted someone to talk to.

After we did the normal introductions he went on to tell me all about his life and how he was actually on his way to see his girlfriend who he was in a very long distance relationship with. Long story short he really cared about her and wanted to be with her but just couldn't see how it was going to work. He felt that the weekend was going to be make it or break it. I gave him the normal advice of if it is meant to be then bla bla bla but in all honesty I didn't really know what to think of the situation.

Whilst the realist in me was thinking - it will never work and better to end it now the romantic in me was really hoping it had a happy ending. Mostly I was just annoyed with Stuart. He was 37 and had done very little with his life. He seemed like the sort of person whose life was only complete if he was in a relationship and therefore hadn't found himself as a single person. I think I may have said this to him however if I am honest he did most of the talking.

Anyway I got off the plane thinking how I was so happy I was making the most of my life but also I realised that my life was not the life for everyone.

I never did find out what happened with Stuart but I am going to hope that whatever the outcome he is happy as he genuinely seemed to be a lovely guy!

-x-

And relax

So the last time I posted I was sat at the airport ready to head off on my mini adventure. Well today's post is brought to you from the comfort of my slightly small incredibly packed flight seat. Obviously by the time you read this I will be home as even in this day and age we are not allowed internet on planes.

When I said I was going to fall off the no drinking wagon in a dramatic way I was not lying. The weekend was spent day drinking, eating tapas and chatting with some genuinely lovely people.

Friday when I arrived after having to negotiate my way across half of Spain with very little knowledge of the local language I met up with the girls I was staying with and we cracked open beers and wine and caught up on everything that had been going on. It was great. We then went out but I was so tired from my early start that I left to go to bed early.

Saturday and Sunday were spent doing some site seeing and stopping every so often for a beer or two. The weather was ok so it was nice to sit outside and relax.

I have realised that my old roommate whilst works very hard has in fact a lovely life and one I may look into when I have finished my travels.

Anyway I better put my phone away before the stewardess thinks I am trying to send some sneaky texts and takes it away from me.

I cannot wait to tell you about the guy I met on the flight out here. He certainly was a character.
However for now I will leave you with a little thought.

Good things do not come to those who wait, they come to those to work for them and aspire to be the best they can be

xx

Its Madrid baby!

That's right people, I have finally broken away from work and am now currently sat at the airport waiting to fly to Spain.

I have to say I do love that about living in the UK. Not many people can say "Oh I am just popping over to Spain for the weekend" but us good old British can. We have so much on our door step that anyone who has never left the country should be ashamed of themselves.

Anyway off to Spain I head for a weekend of girl talk, alcohol and dancing. Might even try and throw a nice Spanish man into the mix too if I am lucky! If I haven't told you I am going to visit my old roommate which I am really excited about as I have missed her loads since she left.

Also I did it guys. I managed to go a whole 31 days without any alcohol or chocolate! I plan to fall off the wagon in a dramatic style later on tonight. I cannot wait!

Right I better sign off as I need to go and do the normal things you do when you are at an airport - duty free shopping!! Oh and try not to miss my flight.

Have a great weekend all

-x-

Wow what a week

I genuinely do not think I have ever been as busy or as stressed as what I have been this week. That teamed up with not drinking, not eating chocolate and not being to exercise has made me one very grumpy girl.

I am missing sex now too. You guys probably haven't been counting like me but it has been 6 months. 6 long hard months. To some this may not seem long but to me who barely went 2 weeks without it before it seems to feel like a lifetime. Although I moan I am not too bothered. If I look at some of my friends Olivia it has been 8 months, the super sidekick it has almost been 9 and my old room mate it has been a year. Christ one of my friends it has been years and I mean years. Anyway I guess what I am saying is I shouldn't moan too much and is it really all that important if I don't have it.

Guess it is better than sleeping around with randomers - or is it?!

-x-