Saturday 31 March 2012

Last night

Last night it was a friend’s birthday so a group of us all went out. We actually ventured out to the place I was supposed to go on my birthday before Mr FWB ruined all that. I have to say I was a little apprehensive about going there as the last time I had been there I was with “him”.

I really do believe I handled it really well and I enjoyed myself a lot. That isn’t to say the night didn’t remind me of him and yes at times I felt like I wanted to contact him. I didn’t though which I believe was a step in the right direction. It helped that I had a friend contacting me who was giving me a pep talk on how he was no good for me and I deserved so much better. Some friends are just great aren’t they!

Gold star to me for not giving into temptation.

This morning I woke up to my Dad spraying water on my bedroom window with a power washer. The reason you ask, oh well he wanted to wake me up because he was “lonely” and wanted someone to talk to. Yes my parents are a little like children but I wouldn’t have them any other way. I am however rethinking my idea of moving out as I really do like a lay in on a Saturday. J

So my plans for the rest of the weekend are as follow, go for a walk with Dad (need to keep the old guy entertained). Try and find some new boots for work, which I might add is a lot harder than people think and if anyone knows of any good websites please let me know. Tonight I plan to just relax and watch a film (can’t be doing this two nights out in a row business) and then tomorrow I don’t really have any plans but I am sure someone somewhere will be having me doing something.

Hope you are all having great weekends! –x-

Thursday 29 March 2012

Yay!

I have received some great news today. My friend who has been struggling with getting her UK visa has informed me today that it looks like she has solved the issue and will be on her way to live and work here soon. I cannot wait until she gets here and am literally bursting with excitement.

I met her whilst travelling and we clicked from the moment we first spoke to each other. It’s funny how that can happen isn’t it. There are people who I have been friends with for years who I still don’t click with as much as what I do this person.

I think her being here is going to encourage me to want to leave again as she will be here for some months and then go off travelling again. I am just going to be too tempted to join her. Ahhhh!

Guess that means I won’t be moving out of home for the time being. Oh well who really wants independence anyway.

So my friend who reads my blog messaged me to talk about yesterday’s post and he told me that it made him think of his favourite quote  "I'd rather be alone for the right reasons, than be with someone for the wrong ones". This is so true and a perfect reflection of how I feel right now! J

Wednesday 28 March 2012

A little moan! (no not the good kind)

Yesterday was a good day! Well except for having to work and being stuck in traffic for ages.

The sun was shining, I got to spend my lunch gossiping with some work colleagues in the sun (what girls don’t love to gossip). Then last night I spoke to a friend I met whilst travelling for about an hour and a half on the phone catching up and reminiscing. The only problem with the catch up was it has really really made me want to go away again. This weather whilst amazing isn’t helping.

Anyway enough of what I want to do! I have a moan that I need getting off my chest. Now as I have said many times I have no problem with being single (if I say it enough times I may start believing it). Only playing, I do genuinely have no issue with it. The issue I do have is how other people treat you.

Last night my parents kindly asked me if I wanted to go to a work function with them. A dinner/dance type thing. However they started the conversation with “I don’t suppose you could find a date for the end of April could you”. Well the answer was no (I probably could, I am just making a point). Anyway they implied that this kind of event was really only for couples. Why? Do I need a partner to feed me! Am I not able to have a dance with my family and their friends! Obviously not.

I know they didn’t mean anything by it but it does still annoy me how you are treated differently when you are single. I don’t have the plague. I promise!

Ok rant over J

-x-

Monday 26 March 2012

Time to be a little more upbeat!

I am reading another blog from a single girl and today went back to when she first started writing it (I haven’t been reading it long). Recently she has seemed a little depressed about being single and having thoughts of how she is never going to find “the one”. I wanted to see what her outlook was like a few years ago and as I imagined she was a lot more upbeat and seemed far more optimistic about life.

I think it is a shame where she is at now and really do feel for her. I just wanted to say to her (if she is reading this) and everyone else not to feel sad about anything you cannot change. I do not have a boyfriend as you all know and yes I do feel a little down about it at times but I as I cannot click my fingers and change the situation I do not see the point in worrying about it. It would make for a very sad life if I was to let it bother me all the time. Do I ever think I won’t find anyone again? No! There is absolutely no reason why I won’t so therefore I believe it will happen.

So the weekend gone was a very good one however it left me with a lot of thoughts and decisions to make. Saturday I went for a coffee with my Mum and we talked about my plans and what I wanted to do. I currently live at home and do want to move out however I also want to move away. Potentially to another country! I do not really see what I have round here to actually keep me. I love my family and I would miss them but I think if the opportunity arose for me to go then I would take it. This is all early days stuff at the moment but still something to think about. Give me a week and I will be back to my original decision of moving closer to work (yes I am just that indecisive).

Anyway I hope you all had good weekends and for any of you who didn’t – chin up, it’s not the end of the world. You always have next weekend to make an improvement! J

Sending any of you who think you are missing out a big hug and lots of love! -x -



Friday 23 March 2012

My weekend coming!

So isn’t it strange how one day you can feel down and the next day feel better. Yesterday was a bit of a down day however today I feel ok. Probably because it is Friday, the sun is shining and I have a good weekend lined up.

Tonight I am off to my Sister’s for dinner (she is an amazing cook so this is definitely something to look forward to). Tomorrow day time I am meeting up with a friend who I haven’t seen for ages. Tomorrow night I am off for dinner and to the cinema and then Sunday I am playing golf (yes another thing you didn’t know about me) and going to a BBQ (still however waiting for the invite from my brother in law).

I had a bit of a confidence boost last night as well. A guy 5 years younger than me contacted me online and asked if there was a chance I would be interested in going for a drink with him. He was nice looking however even I know 5 years is too young and therefore thanked him but declined the offer. I was flattered though! J

Anyway I hope you all have great plans for the weekend

-x-

Thursday 22 March 2012

Get over it!

Firstly let me apologise for the lack of updates recently. I have actually had to do some work the last couple of days and haven’t had the chance to get on here. This has also made me tired when I get home so I have pretty much got in had dinner and either watched TV or read a book. This in turn has left me alone with my own thoughts. A dangerous concept I can assure you. This leads me on to today’s post……!

I am not going to lie I have been struggling with getting over Mr FWB. I am not sure why this is any different to anyone else I have had a relationship with but I do think it has a lot to do with the fact we work together and therefore have to speak to each other. In the past if things have ended with someone I have usually done the normal hide their Facebook notifications, deleted their number and not seen them. Well I have done the first two with Mr FWB but obviously unless I want to leave my job I cannot do the third. So how do you stop yourself from caring?

Some of my friends do not seem to quite understand or at least they have forgotten what it feels like to have this happen so when they say “just forget him” and call him names it doesn’t really help. The thing is I would do exactly the same if I was in their position, unfortunately I have realised that It just makes you feel more like you can’t talk about it as you don’t want them to think you are not coping and sound like a broken record.

I truly think the only way to get over someone you like is to meet someone else. Can you really do that though when your mind is always stuck in the past? Speaking from experience I believe you can as I moved on from my ex-husband but I don’t think it is a quick process or an easy one.

I said above that this was different to other relationships however in all honesty I think I feel like it is because it is the freshest and really they all felt like this. Just proves though that eventually it doesn’t seem so bad. I just wish that feeling would bloody hurry up and get here so I can feel like my wonderful self again! J

Oh well nearly the weekend!

-x-

Monday 19 March 2012

The date

So this weekend was date weekend. Unfortunately guys I don’t have great news for you. The guy in particular was very nice and fairly good looking. There just wasn’t the connection that I wanted.

I am looking for someone who can really make me laugh and unfortunately it was not going to be him. As I said he was a lovely guy and we did get along but I wasn’t exactly wishing time to stand still so we could spend longer together. If anything I was thinking how I would rather have been at home having a cup of tea and a chat with my Mum and Dad. That makes him sound boring which isn’t fair as he really wasn’t and conversation flowed fine. If I am honest I kept thinking how very different it was being there with him to being out with Mr FWB. Don’t get me wrong that doesn’t mean that I want Mr FWB it just means don’t want anything less than the fun we had.

This has kind of confirmed though that online dating isn’t really the right thing for me. I will stay online for now (I am signed up for 3 months so would be pointless coming off) I am just not going to pin my hopes on meeting someone on there. I think there is too much pressure on the first date to hopefully find each other the perfect match without actually getting to know each other as friends. As I have said before I am a big believer in being friends first and then building a relationship from that. This is obviously just my opinion and that doesn’t mean I would ever tell anyone not to give it ago. At the end of the day you really have nothing to lose trying these things.

Unfortunately Mr Online was interested in me and asked to see me again to which I explained he wasn’t what I was looking for. I did not enjoy doing that one little bit and afterwards felt really bad. I couldn’t however have gone on another date with him knowing I was only doing it for his sake and not my own. I also wasn’t going to lie and do the whole “it’s not you, it’s me” as the truth is it was a bit of both.

On a slightly brighter note Dana and I have decided to try speed dating. I think this is going to be a little better for me as there is less pressure with meeting someone and it actually looks like it could be a lot of fun. I will let you know when that is happening and keep you up to date with how it turns out.

For now however I am still Singlegirl! x

Thursday 15 March 2012

The potential


Big news people. Single girl has a date! Yes that’s right a real go for drinks date. Ahhhhhh!

I suppose you are wondering where this has come from, well I met him on the good old online dating. Oh and no this is not the one I previously spoke about. We are done with that one. Anyway I was really about to give up all hope and then I came across someone who caught my eye. I did the brave thing and sent him a quick hello. Just when I was starting to think he wasn’t interested, he replied. We have sent a few emails back and forth and it looks like we have quite a bit in common. I am meeting him for lunch this weekend which is exciting. I am really nervous though as I haven’t been on a real date for a very long time. Especially with someone who I don’t actually know.

So now the fun bit starts! What do I wear?!

The bad news is that Dana can’t go out this weekend anymore so it doesn’t look like I will have anything exciting to update you about on that front Monday L

Wednesday 14 March 2012

My vice

Ok some girls have handbags and some have shoes. My vice however is underwear! I absolutely love it. I cannot walk past an underwear shop without having to go in and nearly every time buying something.

I don’t know how long I have had my infatuation with underwear but I think it first started when I was about 18 and bought myself my first pair of French knickers.



Up until that point I wore thongs but never really got on with them and didn’t think they were particularly flattering. They show far too much and as 99% of us don’t have perfect bums they don’t exactly look great either. I know guys have different preferences to what they would like to see their girlfriend/wife in but I believe what you wear should be down to you and what makes you feel the sexiest. Sexy on the inside spills over to the outside.



I will always wear nice underwear. I could be dressed in a tracksuit with no makeup and my hair scraped back but I will still always have nice underwear on. It is like my own little naughty secret. I have to be honest though, I don’t always match. I also have some crazy colours which I love to wear from time to time. Again it is for my own bit of fun and what I have underneath my clothes is for my eyes only (well unless I have a good Saturday night) besides no one wants to have underwear like their Mum! J

 

Tuesday 13 March 2012

Marriage

As I have previously told you I have been married. A lot of people ask me why it finished and too be honest I don’t really know myself. I do however have an opinion on marriage that I have decided to share. Lucky guys you are!

Ok so I have always wondered why these days marriages don’t last when my parents are this year are celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. I believe it is down to how times have changed over the years. When my Mum and Dad were younger they had their set roles in a marriage. Dad went out to work whilst Mum stayed at home and looked after the children. Whether this was right or wrong this is just how the times were. These days however women are having children later and are wanting careers. They are constantly trying to prove that they are just as good (or in most instances) better than men at a job. J

My ex-husband really wanted children however I didn’t see that as an option at the time and had no interest in being tied down like that. I desperately wanted to do well in my job. I don’t think that if we had decided to have children at the time that our marriage would have lasted but it definitely caused a few issues.

Obviously there are many other reasons as to why a marriage doesn’t work but this is purely based on when two people drift apart. As I said this is just my own opinion and is not necessarily correct. Of course there are exceptions to the above. My sister and her husband I have no doubt will be together forever or at least I hope they are and can therefore restore my faith in marriages.

Monday 12 March 2012

The confession

So up until now I have been a little reserved when talking about my sex life or lack of as the case may be at the moment. Well today I thought I would let you into a little secret. One that very few people know. On a recent trip abroad I may have had a little bit of fun. Ok not a little bit. A lot. Yes I know what you are probably thinking – wasn’t I seeing Mr FWB. Well the answer is yes and I did at the time feel guilty, that guilty in fact that I went back the next night for some more “fun”. Well if you have already committed the crime once you might as well make the most of it. So I did, 3 times!

In all seriousness though yes I did feel bad about it however now I am pleased it happened J

He was a lovely guy and incredibly good looking (no it isn’t just the beer goggles saying that). The first night I met him he asked me if I wanted to go back to his room to watch TV, no I am not stupid and yes I knew exactly what this meant. So I followed and let’s just say not much TV got watched. He asked me to stay the night however I am not really the cuddly type of girl so didn’t really see the point. I got what I had gone there for and did not need to stay any longer. I think he was a little hurt by this but what did he expect, it was just a holiday fling. Anyway the following night I found myself with not much to do and decided to go and knock on his door. Luckily for me he was in, didn’t hold a grudge against me for running out and agreed to come for some drinks. This ended up pretty much the same as the previous night with me going back to his. However on this occasion I fell asleep and didn’t get up until he had to leave the next day. The sweet guy even slipped me his email address on the way out. Maybe one day I will use it but I do think these things are best left with what happens abroad stays abroad!

I so wanted to tell Mr FWB about this when the incident happened on my birthday but I knew he would think I was making it up so I kept it to myself. Well until now anyway! J

Friday 9 March 2012

What does the weekend have in store!

Well after last weekend’s excitement of feeling too old I decided to keep this one a little more low key. Tonight I am being very exciting and going to the gym. Woo hoo check me out. Well seeing as I don’t have my regular sexercise anymore I have to find other ways to stay in shape. I know which one I would prefer to be doing on a Friday night and it certainly isn’t lifting weights at a sweaty gym!

Tomorrow night I am doing my monthly dinner and bowling with my friends and family. I love this! It is so much fun and everyone enjoys themselves. I am very close to my family and my friends are just as close. It makes a nice change to going out getting drunk which is good. I have a song stuck in my head at the moment and it is Kelly Clarkson’s “Stronger”. If you haven’t heard it then it is worth a listen. It is your typical girl power type song but there are some lyrics in there which always make me smile. They are “Doesn’t mean I’m lonely when I’m alone”. I can really relate to this at the moment and especially this weekend. I may be alone because I don’t have a boyfriend but I am certainly not lonely as I have amazing friends and family around me to always make me smile.

Anyway next weekend will be a little different to this one as Dana and I are going out! That certainly will be interesting I am sure!

Thursday 8 March 2012

The online dating update

I thought I would give you a little update to how the online dating was going. I am still not 100% sure about it. I suppose for me all of my previous relationships have come from being friends first and then building something from that. This all seems a little forced. Also it is completely based on looks. I don’t think that makes me shallow saying that but you really are not going to click on someone you don’t find attractive. My longest relationship I had strangely enough I didn’t even find attractive when I first met him. He was so funny though and could make me laugh in any situation. From that I slowly started to find him attractive and saw him in a different light. I don’t believe people when they say things like “I don’t want to ruin the friendship”. This just means you don’t fancy the person and you are looking for an excuse. Not that you are actually worried about staying friends.

Anyway all the above aside I have actually been contacted by someone who on the surface is what I would go for looks wise and has similar interests. I am not sure if it will go anywhere but I did say I would give this a try and really make an effort so for now I will just say, to be continued…..!

On a brighter note Mr FWB tried to send me an overly friendly email the other day and I dismissed it like he could have been anyone. See guys I really am trying. J

Tuesday 6 March 2012

Dana's weekend

So I have told you about my disastrous texting weekend now it is time for Dana’s slightly more interesting one!

Whilst I was feeling old and embarrassing myself she was also out. However her night involved drinking Champagne and having a great time. By the end of it she had met up with an old flame of hers. Now I don’t know the details of how this meeting came about however I can’t imagine it was purely by coincidence. Dana doesn’t do coincidence. Anyway let’s say they ended up back at hers and in her words he was trying to be a little reserved but she seduced him. Successfully.

I think we can safely say the good old Dana is back. The poor boy will now no doubt be smitten with her and she will dismiss him like he is a used sock when she has finished with him. Cruel you may say but come on it is about time girls got to have a bit of fun! J

Monday 5 March 2012

The weekend

So this weekend I went away to see an old friend. We decided to get dressed up and go out into town. Well what can I say, I felt old. I am still in my 20’s and I felt old going out. How wrong is that. Everyone looked so young. I think it may just be the area we were in as I have never felt old going out in my own home town. I think it is fair to say I wont be going back there again for a while. Doesn’t give the old confidence a nice boost.

My friend has also decided that I am far too fussy with men. I don’t think I am fussy, I just think I know what I like and am not going to settle for anything less. I am happy being single so why would I want to change for something that isn’t better? She kept pointing men out to me and asking if I found them attractive. The answer was pretty much always no. I now blame her for what I did next in my drunken state. I messaged Mr FWB! Error! We wont go into what I said but lets just say it wasn’t one of my most proudest moments. Wow I feel better for getting that off my chest J

So on a brighter note I joined a dating website. So far I have had a lot of interest from guys which is always nice but I have yet to find anyone I would actually go on a date with. I am not sure how I feel about the whole rejecting them when they contact you thing. Seems cruel somehow. Everything comes down to looks when you are online dating and I am not sure how fair that is. My perfect man would have to be able to make me laugh and if they can’t do that then I am not interested. I don’t care how good looking they are.

Anyway I am going to keep giving it ago and hopefully I do find someone I would actually like to go on a date with. Fingers crossed!

Friday 2 March 2012

Online dating

Ok so I have decided I am going to try online dating. Although I enjoy being single I was speaking to my friend Carly yesterday about how she was doing it and thought what the heck I am going to see if it is really worth it.

Now my question is, why is it such a secretive thing. When speaking with Carly she kept telling me to kept my voice down as she didn’t want people to know she was online. Why not? Is it really something to be embarrassed about. Where else do you meet people? I think the most common place is at work. However Mr FWB was from work and look how well that one turned out. I think people assume only “weirdo’s” go on there but surely you get “weirdo’s” in the pub or in the supermarket as well. At least online you get to see what people’s interests are and whether they would suit you. Anyway I haven’t decided which one to go on yet so will have a look around and see what’s best. Will let you know how I get on.