Thursday, 30 August 2012

Confessions pt 2

That’s right I have a confession to make. I have once again fallen to the charms of Mr FWB and slept with him! Whoops

You are all probably smacking your foreheads and shouting why. Well I have come up with an answer to that one (and no I am not just trying to justify it).

I don’t want a one night stand and as I am going away next year I don’t see the point of starting a new relationship with someone. He is just easy and by now I know exactly what I am getting. Nothing! I guess also I think to myself I have done it so many times that what does one more time hurt.

Am I stupid – most definitely
Do I regret it – not at all this time
Will I do it again – More than likely

I honestly don’t believe it will stop until the day I leave. Or unless he actually manages to find someone he wants to be with and be faithful.

On a brighter note I managed to run 6 miles again last night! Yay for me! That hasn’t softened the blow of what I just told you has it.

Ok I am going to back out of this blog carefully and without saying another word!


Tuesday, 28 August 2012

Everyone loves a long weekend!

This weekend was great! I have to say it was one of the best I have had for a while. Saturday saw me turn into superstar and had me recording my own song in a real studio. It was so much fun and really professional. It gave me a good idea to how the whole process works. Even though I won’t be the next Lady Gaga I still enjoyed the whole experience.

Sunday I went to a festival and it was brilliant. We were so lucky with the weather as it had rained all of Saturday but Sunday the sun shone the whole day J

Yesterday I mostly spent my time cleaning the house (I know rock and roll) and then I went for a 6 mile run. To think I couldn’t even run a mile without stopping not that long ago 6 miles is a huge achievement for me.

I cannot really think of anything else to report on. I am not sure if that is a good or bad thing. I normally seem to have more to write about when things go wrong. Maybe I should just be happy that the weekend didn’t throw up any dramas.

Even better as it was a bank holiday I only have 3 and a half more days at work till the weekend (not that I am wishing my life away)


Friday, 24 August 2012

Drinking on a school night should be banned!

Last night I went out for a work dinner. It was supposed to just be a quiet dinner and a relatively early night. Not so much. I ended up getting in about 1 in the morning, pretty drunk and high on life.

I was high on life until I woke up this morning and felt like something had died in my mouth and remembered I had to go to work! Life sucks. L

I have pretty much spent all day feeling sorry for myself refusing to work and watching the clock counting down the hours till I can crawl back into my bed!

I have however come across the funniest website I have seen in a long time and just had to share it with you

Anyone with a dog or has had a dog is going to appreciate each and every single one of these!

So the weekend is here. Tomorrow I have my big singing debut followed by a night of TV watching and dinner at my sisters. Sunday I am off to a festival for the day so will pretty much be drinking, listening to hopefully some good music all whilst trying to avoid the rain.

Monday I shall sleep. All day long! J

Have a great weekend guys


Thursday, 23 August 2012

Just a little story

I want to tell you guys a story which Olivia told me not that long ago. I hope she doesn’t mind me telling you but I really think it reflects on how I see life at the moment.

Her Granddad worked for a car dealership for years. I think it was Ford (I could be slightly wrong with the exact details) anyway he worked long passed retirement and late into his life. When he finally did retire he treated himself to a new convertible BMW. Obviously having worked for Ford he had always owned Ford cars. Secretly though he really wanted a BMW. Anyway the time came for him to finally have what he wanted and near the end of last year he bought his dream car.

The months passed by and he drove it around with pride but because of the weather (snow in the early months and none stop rain in the later ones) he never got to put the roof down. The one thing he had always wanted to do. Sadly he passed away a couple of months ago. He never got to experience driving around in his dream car with the roof down in the sunshine.

When she told me this it made me really sad but also it just made me really determined to not put off anything until it was too late! Hence my travelling and seeing the world plans.

As the great James Dean once said “Dream as if you'll live forever.  Live as if you'll die today.”


Wednesday, 22 August 2012

The plans are being made

So I have decided that this time next year my travels will begin. I need about a year to pay the debts I have and then have enough money to head off and not come back for a while. Yesterday I put together a plan of what I wanted to see and how long I am planning on spending in each place. For a very short moment I had to check with Melissa on whether she thought I was too old for all this and she soon slapped me in the face and told me not to be so silly.

I am not cut out for this life of 9-5 (well 5:30 in my job) and know there is so much more out there to see and do. To say I am a little excited is a slight under statement however due to it being a year away and I don’t actually want work to sack me, I have to keep it all a bit quiet! Boo L

Now starts the fun bit, saving! I have a bit of a plan in place of how I am going to manage it and Melissa is going to give me a weekly allowance so I really stick to it. This Friday we are going to start playing the lottery. You know just in case J

I cannot believe it has been nearly a year since I booked my flights for my last travelling experience. That just shows how quickly time goes and I do not want to waste another minute on doing nothing.

Ahhhh I am sooo excited!!


Monday, 20 August 2012

I kissed a boy and I liked it!

Woo hoo finally the last person I kissed is not Mr ex FWB!

That’s right, Friday night I kissed another boy. I am told he was a very good looking South African but I cannot confirm this as I can’t really remember. I wasn’t even that drunk, it just all happened really quickly! Anyway I am pleased as this is the first stage of my baby steps towards getting Mr ex FWB out of my life J

Someone even mentioned to me about Mr ex FWB and the girl from work and where as I would have normally run off crying to my bed, I just shrugged it off. I am slowly getting there I think.

So back to the weekend. Friday was good fun. We played Flip Cup and then headed into town. Aside from kissing someone there isn’t much else to report.

Saturday day Melissa and I tried to go to do some sightseeing however we ended up nearly gate crashing a wedding. Whoops. Instead we just went food shopping. Rock and roll, I know.

Saturday night I headed to my sisters for a BBQ and some karaoke. Warming up the old vocals for this weekend.

Yesterday me and Melissa just sunbathed in the garden and watched a couple of films. Very relaxing which was nice.

Dana messaged me Saturday to tell me how much sex she had been having (yep she does that occasionally). She has still been meeting up with the old flame and apparently they had sex over his car, in a field and in the sand and sea! At least someone is getting some I suppose! I really have no idea where this is going for her but as long as she is having fun, who cares!

I think that is all I have to report for now. I hope everyone had a good weekend and enjoyed the sunshine (if you had it of course)


Friday, 17 August 2012

It’s Flip Cup time

Ok I am going out! We all knew it would happen. I don’t know why for one second I thought I would try and stay in when everyone else was out.

However before I go out we will be entering into a game of Flip Cup. What is Flip Cup I hear you ask (as has so many other people when I have told them). Well it is a drinking game where you are in teams, you down your drink, slam the cup down on the edge of the table then flip the cup over so it lands upside down. Once you have managed this and it isn’t as easy as it sounds (I know as I was practising last night) the next member of your team goes. The winning team is whoever manages to finish all their drinks first. Simples!

Once Flip Cup has finished and we are all suitably warmed through with alcohol we will be heading into town. I am half tempted to leave my phone at home so there are no drunken mishaps but I am not sure how sensible that idea really is.

Tomorrow night I am off to my Sisters for a little karaoke session. I am recording a song next weekend so need to warm up the old vocals.

I hope everyone’s weekend is really good and I really hope mine is better than last Friday. Keep your fingers crossed for me J


Wednesday, 15 August 2012

Two down one to go

So I recently found out that one of my work “conquests” had actually handed in his notice and was leaving. I think I may have mentioned that including Mr ex FWB (that is his new name now) there were 3 people from work who I had slept with. The first one left a little while ago and now I have found out that number two is also leaving. This only leaves Mr ex FWB to go and then I have a clean slate J.

Now how can I get him to leave? I welcome any suggestions!

I have felt a little better since my bad weekend. Making plans etc. Tonight I am off to the cinema with Melissa to see Ted. Hopefully it is as good as people say. Tomorrow night I have my parents coming over for dinner and then Friday night I was supposed to be staying in and relaxing however Melissa has already started dropping some not so subtle hints about going out!

I will post again on Friday to let you know whether she has managed to convince me or not


Monday, 13 August 2012

The let down and getting lost

Well to say my weekend was a total let down would only be half true. Saturday night was really good and I had a lovely time. We went for dinner and then for some drinks. It wasn’t a crazy party night but was just perfect. Good food, good bars but most of all good company.

The same however cannot be said for Friday night. The night started off pretty normal with a few drinks in a bar chatting away. The plan obviously was to leave at a reasonable hour. This was so close to happening however when I went to walk out I saw a male friend from work who was out with another guy who I didn’t know. I ended up staying and chatting and drinking with them. This was where the night took a bad twist. My friend from work decided to keep trying it on with me, asking me to go back to his with him. This in itself would be bad however what made it worse is that he is married and he kindly told me his wife was away for the weekend so it was fine. I don’t even think he has been married that long. The friend he was with also tried it on with me and then I found out he had a girlfriend as well. I ended up leaving and in my drunken state crying the whole way home to the taxi driver about how every man was a cheat and there was no good ones out there.

What followed this was my head being thrown down the toilet and the previous night’s dinner making an appearance. All in all not great!

The whole night really left me feeling really crappy and down in the dumps. Not only did I feel like no man could be trusted but I obviously was just seen as an easy lay and a bit of fun for the night. Not quite the impression I want to give off to people.

My head has been all over the place recently and I do think I have gotten a little bit lost. I haven’t been truly happy for a little while and things do need to change. I think I need to take some time for myself and just stay away from alcohol, my local town and all men.

On a brighter note though I managed to book a holiday with my Mum and Dad. I just wish it was a bit sooner than it was as I still have 8 weeks to wait!

Also happy half birthday to me J


Friday, 10 August 2012

Never fear, I am here!

It’s ok people, I did not die during my run last night. I did however nearly pass out at the end but still achieved 5 miles. Pretty pleased with that one. Go me! J

Dana messaged me last night to tell me she was going to see her current man and to let me know their weekend was going to involve a lot of sex and she was packing the naughty clothes. Thanks for the update!

Tonight I am off out into my local town for a friends leaving party. It really cannot be a late one as I have to be up at stupid o’clock to get my car serviced in the morning. Is the fact that I feel like I am going to get home at some ridiculous time a bad sign already.

Tomorrow night I am celebrating my half birthday (yes I have one of those) with my sister and some friends in a different town. I am looking forward to that as it is always nice to get away from the same people once in a while.

The sun once again is shining so I think this weekend is going to be a good one to remember (famous last words).


Thursday, 9 August 2012

They were there and then they were gone

Yes I am referring to my hair extensions. After all the hassle and drama I have had them removed. It turns out they are pretty dam annoying! I can still have them put back in but I think for now I will leave my hair just as it is.

I have been trying to look for a holiday for the last couple of days. I feel the need to get away somewhere and my Mum and Dad have kindly offered to take me away. My god though it is hard to find the right place (and no I am not just being really picky). As there is only 3 of us we are limited to where we can go. I think I am going round there on Saturday to sit down with them and try and make a plan. Some people may think it is sad going on holiday with your Mum and Dad but not me. My parents are pretty much two of the coolest people you will ever meet and I don’t mean that is a young clothes wearing, joint smoking kind of way. They are just really fun to be around.

Last night I went to see the new Batman. It was pretty good. I normally have the attention span of a 5 year old and even I didn’t get bored. This in my books is a good thing J

Tonight I am back on the running. I haven’t been since Sunday which is really bad as I am behind schedule. Hopefully I don’t collapse and die in the woods somewhere along the route. If you do not hear from me tomorrow you know something has gone wrong!


Tuesday, 7 August 2012

A mini update

After my epic post yesterday you would think I have nothing more to say. Well there is a man update and this one is from me.

Don’t start getting all excited on me though. All I have decided is to cancel my online dating again. I know I change like the wind!

I thought about it for a while and decided that the reason I could not find anyone interesting wasn’t because there was anything wrong with them but purely because I actually do not want a boyfriend. It really seems to be all too much like hard work to me and there is too much stress involved with being with someone. Constantly trying to compromise and keep them happy. Not for me!

Also recent events with Mr FWB and the girl from work just show that people cannot be trusted. She was with her boyfriend for a while and threw it all away for one night of drunken rubbish sex (I can confirm it would be rubbish as Mr FWB was not that great when in a state like that). Anyway her boyfriend did find out and I am guessing that relationship is now done with.  

Now I am not saying everyone cheats as I know they do not but it does seem that it is happening more and more these days. Again not something for me.

I also think with going away next year I don’t see the point in trying to start something to only have to leave it behind.

So for now I am back to being a fully single girl who enjoys her own and her friends company J


Monday, 6 August 2012

The transformation, the weekend and the update!

Well where to start! A lot has happened over the last couple of days but I think I will start with the weekend.

Friday was our half year end party and it was so much fun. Melissa, me and another friend got rather drunk but (and I am really just hoping when I say this) we didn’t make fools of ourselves. Someone who did make a fool of himself however was the lovely Mr FWB. The complete and utter tool decided he was going to text me when I got to town to find out what pub I was going to, told me he was coming, to then turn up with a girl from work and proceed to follow me around practically having sex with her in front of my face. If anything I just found this funny really as it was quite obvious that he was just trying to make me jealous. The constant looking in my direction whilst dancing like a pervy old man grinding up against an 18 year old pretty much gave that away. Ok I am not actually sure she is 18 but I do know she has a boyfriend who also works at the same company as us. I wonder if he knows what his darling girl was getting up to as let’s just say they didn’t stop at the old bump and grind!

Unfortunately this put a bit of a downer on my night and I ended up leaving early. I was upset but mostly I was just frustrated with him. I don’t understand what the point was of what he was doing. He acts like I broke up with him and he is annoyed with me but we all know that is not the case. I messaged him the next day to tell him I really didn’t know what to do anymore and had I done something really bad to upset him that he felt he needed to treat me like that. Obviously like the mature grown up he is he did not reply to me. It’s ok though as it just makes me realise what a total giant tool he is with absolutely nothing going for him!

The rest of the weekend was spent having a lovely day with Mr Wise and some other friends and then a BBQ at my sisters. On the Sunday I nursed a very hung over roommate, bless her!

Now for the transformation. I have been waxed, cleaned, dyed and extended to within an inch of my life. I have had my eyebrows waxed, my teeth cleaned, my eyelashes dyed and my hair extensions put in. I think that is enough for now! I know people will probably judge me about why I do all this but as when I had my cosmetic surgery (yes I may have had a couple of things made bigger) I did not care then and I certainly do not care now. I am not hurting anyone with my actions so what should it matter.

Now for the update. Personally I have no man update myself however Dana and Melissa have had some interesting times. Dana has just sent me a message with a good update on what has been happening with her. Firstly she has been messaging a friend of an old work boss however she has told me it wont go anywhere. I think she just likes the attention. Soon she is going on holiday with an old flame which is no surprise as these two always seem to end up back with each other. She has also been talking with the boy a bit as well and doesn’t know yet if they will meet up again or not. I really do not know how she keeps up with all of them. She really is a pro at this multi dating business.

So now for Melissa. She has had a little thing for our friend Smallsie for a while now (not that up until now she has admitted it) however this Saturday saw him turn up to an event she was at with another girl and saw her turn into a drunken jealous mess. We have come to the conclusion that she doesn’t want him but she wants him to always want her. Sound familiar! I have told her this is not fair and she needs to make her mind up. I think for now this one is a “to be continued!”

Ok I think this is the longest post I have done so far so I will leave it there for now.

Hope everyone enjoyed their weekends J


Friday, 3 August 2012

It’s party time!

 Tonight is the night of our half year end party. It involves free food, free drink and with this current weather (yes the heat wave is over) free puddles.

It is an outside event with activities like a bouncy castle. After all who doesn’t love a bouncy castle, especially when there is drink involved. Last year I managed to fall over in front of the whole company before I had even had a drink. Tonight I imagine to be no different.

Finally my hair has arrived and it is so much nicer than the last stuff I ordered. If there is one thing I have learned from this it is never go cheap. Hopefully I should have them put in this weekend if there is time.

So after my last blog a friend of mine, we shall call him Mr Wise, contacted me and complained about what I had wrote about Mr FWB. Now I would like to clear something up for anyone who may have misunderstood what I was getting at. I do not want to be with someone like Mr FWB for his personality. Oh no, I was purely talking about his looks. He is a good looking guy (beauty is in the eye of the beholder so I am sure a few will not agree) however for me he is the least I want in a guy, looks wise.

Personality wise he is a nice guy (when he isn’t screwing girls over) however I want more than what he can offer. I want someone who is actually amazing and not a total tool!

Anyway I hope you all have a wonderful drunken filled weekend, as I know I will! J


Wednesday, 1 August 2012

Hair extension fail!

Well they arrived, they were put in and then they were swiftly taken out again. Unfortunately the quality was terrible and it just ended up with me looking like I needed a really good haircut. Off they go back and I have ordered some more from a company I have previously used. If these don’t work then I give up.

I haven’t had too much luck on the online dating side of things. I know it has only been a few days but I am really finding fault with every guy that talks to me and I don’t know what my problem is. Melissa said I was too judgemental but I think that was a little unfair. I guess I just know what I want and if they do not meet every aspect of that I am not interested. Unfortunately for online dating you really are judging a book by its cover and if I am not finding them attractive straight away then I am not even reading their mails. I have settled in the past and I don’t want to do it again. I also think (and I hate myself for saying this) but I am comparing people too much to Mr FWB. Now I haven’t had contact with him (strictly work related) but I suppose I am not going to settle for anything less. I do however want a lot more. I never really thought I had a type but I am guessing that maybe I do. Not sure if that makes me judgemental or not L

I am not giving up though. I really do want to date but there just has to be that something in the first place.

I messaged Dana last night to find out what has been going on with her lately and am still waiting to hear back. No doubt there is some kind of man drama she will inform me of.

I still need to find a lock and key party. Silly work wont let me search for it here which is a pain. Hopefully I find one soon though as I think it will be something good for me, Melissa and Dana to do! J

Ooo I never told you, I finished 50 Shades of Grey. As expected it did not really improve and I was left feeling a bit meh at the end. I will get the other two books eventually but I am not rushing out any time soon.